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| EFT ARTICLES: EFT Resolves 12-Year Postpartum Depression After Stillbirth |
| "As a doula, I've worked with mothers birthing stillborn babies. One of the most common experiences afterward is that everyone else seems to go back to their lives after the funeral or memorial service. Everyone but the mother, that is. She frequently feels very isolated and alone with her grief, especially as time passes and people seem ready for her to "get over it." I understand that a lot of people don't know what to say, and that death-- especially the death of a newborn-- can make them very uncomfortable. Maybe if we all learned to do EFT, we could just tap together. There would be no need to say anything at all. And it would help so much, and offer so much relief, on both sides of the situation." Eileen Sullivan, EFT-ADV |
by Deirdre Brocklebank, BA
I have been using and teaching EFT with great success for more than five
years. I am also a registered reflexologist and I use EFT combined with
Reflexology and other energy therapies including Reiki, Pranic and Theta
healing for most of my sessions with clients. The majority of my clients are
women and I particularly enjoy working with issues around pregnancy.
This particular client, whom I will call Mary, is a teacher’s assistant and she was
feeling very stressed about getting a job as a result of school closures and
restructuring of the education system. Her main concern, however, was the
postnatal depression which she’d had for the last 12 years. The depression
started after the stillbirth of her second child but it was undiagnosed for 10
years.
She had been on antidepressants for the last 2 years. Mary’s first child was
born by caesarean delivery but she had since had a third child by normal
delivery. Mary had also been experiencing tinnitus for the last 25 years as well
as headaches, migraines, sinus with head pressure and tension, plus fatigue
and low energy. She had also experienced repetitive strain injury in both her
arms since 1982.
The first two-hour session with Mary was comprised of one hour of EFT
followed by one hour of vertical and seated Reflexology including Ayurvedic
massage.
I asked Mary if she would like to start the session by talking about the births of
her first two children. She agreed and as she had some experience with EFT, I
asked her to tap on herself while she talked.
She told me she “desperately wanted a natural birth in the birth centre” for her
first child and in her words “despite taking castor oil, the first baby didn’t
come.” As a consequence of this she had a caesarean. Mary was not able to
rate the intensity of her feelings around this so I asked her to describe what
she was feeling emotionally and how she felt physically. She said she was
feeling defeat with chest tightness and tension in her bowels.
I explained Patricia Carrington’s EFT Choices routine to Mary, as she was not
familiar with this. We then each rubbed on our own Sore Spot for the following
setup statement. Even though I desperately wanted a natural birth in the birth
centre and it didn’t happen, I now choose to believe and accept that the
caesarean was perfect for the Highest Good of both myself and my daughter.
I tapped randomly on Mary’s Top of Head (TH), Eye Brow (EB) and Collar Bone
(CB) points while she tapped one round through from the TH to the KC while
making negative statements including I wanted a natural birth and I failed; she
came when she was ready even though I took the castor oil… This was
followed by two more rounds in which she tapped from the TH to the KC while
making similar statements.
During this tapping Mary developed an increasing tightness in her chest. It felt
as though she had a tight belt around it. I asked her if the belt was buckled or
tied. She said it was buckled and I asked her to mentally “unbuckle” it to
release the tension. This was very effective.
Mary then felt a sharp stabbing pain in her heart chakra. I asked her to
visualise pink light going in through her crown chakra and then into her chest
and heart chakra. I guided her in visualising this light going throughout her
body with love, while it removed any grayness and pain and sent it into the
earth. I then asked Mary to visualise white light going through her to bring in
unconditional love to her entire body. The pain in her heart chakra
disappeared. (I often use lights in this way to bring in love energy and to
remove hurt).
We then tapped on ourselves for her constricted breathing. Mary’s breathing
became easier very quickly following this and she no longer had any remaining
tension in her chest.
Mary and I then tapped on ourselves for a couple of more rounds while she
made positive statements including, I did the right thing choosing a caesarean
for my first daughter. This was followed with a round in which she alternated
negative statements with positive statements. The negative statements
included I feel guilty about having a caesarean; I failed as a woman; I failed as
a mother; I failed my daughter; I failed myself; I’m a control freak... The
positive alternating statements included that mentioned above, plus I’m perfect
the way I am. Following this tapping routine, Mary was able to repeat the story
of the caesarean birth with no adverse emotional or physical reactions.
Mary then became very sad and distressed while talking about her second
child's birth. Once again she had desperately wanted a natural home birth
even though she was advised to have a caesarean. The outcome was that she
did have the baby at home (with a doctor present) and even though “it was a
completely normal birth” the baby was born dead.
She was very distressed and crying while she told me this and so I asked her to
focus on the memory of the incident while I tapped on her. I spoke the following
setup statement while I tapped. Even though I had a stillbirth and if I hadn’t
wanted a home birth so much it would have been OK. I failed the baby and
myself as well. Even so, I deeply and completely accept myself unconditionally
with love and gratitude.
With her permission, I tapped on her CB points while she repeated the following
forgiveness statements after me. I forgive myself for creating this. I forgive
anyone else involved in this. I am ready to let it go. I let it go now. I let it go
completely. Mary was crying during this. I then tapped her gamut point and
she did the 9 procedures for this point while focusing on the birth. I then asked
her to follow my hand with her eyes (without moving her head), as I moved it
from floor to ceiling while she tapped her KC and repeating the following after
me. Even though I still feel sad that I had a stillbirth I deeply and completely
accept myself unconditionally with love and gratitude, plus the forgiveness
statements mentioned above.
When retelling the story Mary said, “I had a still home birth and the contractions
started 10 minutes before Ebony was born.” Mary was feeling deep sadness
but it was general and she no longer felt it in a specific place in her body. I
suggested she mentally thank her daughter for the privilege of knowing her and
that she send her love. She is quite spiritual and she said that she and her
husband “know” that their daughter is still connected to them in love. She also
knew that “the birth was meant to be.”
Mary was now feeling lightness instead of overwhelming sadness and tension. I
muscle tested her and found that she was dehydrated so I asked her to
visualise her body taking in water when she drank. She immediately re-
hydrated and this was confirmed by muscle testing . (I often suggest to my
clients who have trouble hydrating, that they imagine they are a sponge while
drinking the water. This visualisation is very successful in helping with
hydration).
Mary then retold the story of the stillbirth and shocked herself when she said “I
had a wonderful stillbirth.” She burst out laughing about this. She said for the
first time since her daughter was born dead she was feeling joy, instead of pain
when she thought about her.
Mary also responded well to the Reflexology after the EFT and during the
treatment she felt energy flowing into her arms and fingers where she had the
repetitive strain injury. At the end of the session she felt lighter, without any
tension in her chest. She also no longer had any pressure in her head which
was unusual for her.
I have since seen Mary for two more treatments. The stillbirth is definitely no
longer an issue for her and her energy improved dramatically after the first
session. The next morning she woke up feeling great and went for a walk “for
the first time in ages.” She looked as though she had had “an emotional face
lift” and she felt as though “a light had gone on inside” her. After the second
session her energy dropped off a bit due to work and other stresses and we
addressed this in the third session.
I have been using and teaching EFT with great success for more than five
years. I am also a registered reflexologist and I use EFT combined with
Reflexology and other energy therapies including Reiki, Pranic and Theta
healing for most of my sessions with clients. The majority of my clients are
women and I particularly enjoy working with issues around pregnancy.
This particular client, whom I will call Mary, is a teacher’s assistant and she was
feeling very stressed about getting a job as a result of school closures and
restructuring of the education system. Her main concern, however, was the
postnatal depression which she’d had for the last 12 years. The depression
started after the stillbirth of her second child but it was undiagnosed for 10
years.
She had been on antidepressants for the last 2 years. Mary’s first child was
born by caesarean delivery but she had since had a third child by normal
delivery. Mary had also been experiencing tinnitus for the last 25 years as well
as headaches, migraines, sinus with head pressure and tension, plus fatigue
and low energy. She had also experienced repetitive strain injury in both her
arms since 1982.
The first two-hour session with Mary was comprised of one hour of EFT
followed by one hour of vertical and seated Reflexology including Ayurvedic
massage.
I asked Mary if she would like to start the session by talking about the births of
her first two children. She agreed and as she had some experience with EFT, I
asked her to tap on herself while she talked.
She told me she “desperately wanted a natural birth in the birth centre” for her
first child and in her words “despite taking castor oil, the first baby didn’t
come.” As a consequence of this she had a caesarean. Mary was not able to
rate the intensity of her feelings around this so I asked her to describe what
she was feeling emotionally and how she felt physically. She said she was
feeling defeat with chest tightness and tension in her bowels.
I explained Patricia Carrington’s EFT Choices routine to Mary, as she was not
familiar with this. We then each rubbed on our own Sore Spot for the following
setup statement. Even though I desperately wanted a natural birth in the birth
centre and it didn’t happen, I now choose to believe and accept that the
caesarean was perfect for the Highest Good of both myself and my daughter.
I tapped randomly on Mary’s Top of Head (TH), Eye Brow (EB) and Collar Bone
(CB) points while she tapped one round through from the TH to the KC while
making negative statements including I wanted a natural birth and I failed; she
came when she was ready even though I took the castor oil… This was
followed by two more rounds in which she tapped from the TH to the KC while
making similar statements.
During this tapping Mary developed an increasing tightness in her chest. It felt
as though she had a tight belt around it. I asked her if the belt was buckled or
tied. She said it was buckled and I asked her to mentally “unbuckle” it to
release the tension. This was very effective.
Mary then felt a sharp stabbing pain in her heart chakra. I asked her to
visualise pink light going in through her crown chakra and then into her chest
and heart chakra. I guided her in visualising this light going throughout her
body with love, while it removed any grayness and pain and sent it into the
earth. I then asked Mary to visualise white light going through her to bring in
unconditional love to her entire body. The pain in her heart chakra
disappeared. (I often use lights in this way to bring in love energy and to
remove hurt).
We then tapped on ourselves for her constricted breathing. Mary’s breathing
became easier very quickly following this and she no longer had any remaining
tension in her chest.
Mary and I then tapped on ourselves for a couple of more rounds while she
made positive statements including, I did the right thing choosing a caesarean
for my first daughter. This was followed with a round in which she alternated
negative statements with positive statements. The negative statements
included I feel guilty about having a caesarean; I failed as a woman; I failed as
a mother; I failed my daughter; I failed myself; I’m a control freak... The
positive alternating statements included that mentioned above, plus I’m perfect
the way I am. Following this tapping routine, Mary was able to repeat the story
of the caesarean birth with no adverse emotional or physical reactions.
Mary then became very sad and distressed while talking about her second
child's birth. Once again she had desperately wanted a natural home birth
even though she was advised to have a caesarean. The outcome was that she
did have the baby at home (with a doctor present) and even though “it was a
completely normal birth” the baby was born dead.
She was very distressed and crying while she told me this and so I asked her to
focus on the memory of the incident while I tapped on her. I spoke the following
setup statement while I tapped. Even though I had a stillbirth and if I hadn’t
wanted a home birth so much it would have been OK. I failed the baby and
myself as well. Even so, I deeply and completely accept myself unconditionally
with love and gratitude.
With her permission, I tapped on her CB points while she repeated the following
forgiveness statements after me. I forgive myself for creating this. I forgive
anyone else involved in this. I am ready to let it go. I let it go now. I let it go
completely. Mary was crying during this. I then tapped her gamut point and
she did the 9 procedures for this point while focusing on the birth. I then asked
her to follow my hand with her eyes (without moving her head), as I moved it
from floor to ceiling while she tapped her KC and repeating the following after
me. Even though I still feel sad that I had a stillbirth I deeply and completely
accept myself unconditionally with love and gratitude, plus the forgiveness
statements mentioned above.
When retelling the story Mary said, “I had a still home birth and the contractions
started 10 minutes before Ebony was born.” Mary was feeling deep sadness
but it was general and she no longer felt it in a specific place in her body. I
suggested she mentally thank her daughter for the privilege of knowing her and
that she send her love. She is quite spiritual and she said that she and her
husband “know” that their daughter is still connected to them in love. She also
knew that “the birth was meant to be.”
Mary was now feeling lightness instead of overwhelming sadness and tension. I
muscle tested her and found that she was dehydrated so I asked her to
visualise her body taking in water when she drank. She immediately re-
hydrated and this was confirmed by muscle testing . (I often suggest to my
clients who have trouble hydrating, that they imagine they are a sponge while
drinking the water. This visualisation is very successful in helping with
hydration).
Mary then retold the story of the stillbirth and shocked herself when she said “I
had a wonderful stillbirth.” She burst out laughing about this. She said for the
first time since her daughter was born dead she was feeling joy, instead of pain
when she thought about her.
Mary also responded well to the Reflexology after the EFT and during the
treatment she felt energy flowing into her arms and fingers where she had the
repetitive strain injury. At the end of the session she felt lighter, without any
tension in her chest. She also no longer had any pressure in her head which
was unusual for her.
I have since seen Mary for two more treatments. The stillbirth is definitely no
longer an issue for her and her energy improved dramatically after the first
session. The next morning she woke up feeling great and went for a walk “for
the first time in ages.” She looked as though she had had “an emotional face
lift” and she felt as though “a light had gone on inside” her. After the second
session her energy dropped off a bit due to work and other stresses and we
addressed this in the third session.
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